Who had paranoia on their bingo card?

Since last month’s Musings, a lot has happened on the book front. Weird things. Unbelievable things. Disappointing things. Frightening things. Things that seem so impossible, I have to double back and trace their progression to remind myself I didn’t make it all up.

The bad news is, I’ve only really edited one chapter in the book. It’s a huge and embarrassing confession to make. There’s nothing I want more than to be done with this project so I can get back to the books I love to write. Anyone who’s read this blog for any length of time has seen me complain about it. Too much, if I’m being honest. I’m writing it out of love and concern for the victims’ surviving relatives, after all. People I know, am close to, and for whom I would do anything. So maybe I need to just stop with the pity party.

That said, writing a true crime book about an unsolved multiple murder is not the same as writing a true crime book about a solved murder. Access to documents is difficult, and mostly impossible. Witnesses are hesitant to talk. It may be unwise to approach certain people for an interview. These murders have resulted in decades of rumors, conspiracies, speculations, and criticisms involving potential suspects, law enforcement, and leads that may or may not have been adequately followed. And where the conspiracies are largely ridiculous, all need to be explored. Criticisms, on the other hand, are justified in most instances—particularly those involving law enforcement. Many witnesses and most of the suspects are long dead. The probability of justice being served? Essentially zip. Yet this story must be told.

Even if not by me.

Wait—what? Did I just type that out loud?

Yep. Guilty as charged. That’s where the past month’s slow start in the big edit comes in. Where paranoia seized me and sometimes still grips me in its cold, steel talons.

Please understand that what I’m about to say will sound sketchy, unbelievable, and probably like I’m trying to manufacture anticipation for the book by throwing a curve ball into the mix. And forgive me because I can’t relay the entire situation (yet). Not only because you’ll need to get and read the book to know the full story, but because there are literally people around right now who seek to kill this book before it gets released. This includes some law enforcement (former and current), relatives of some of the primary suspects, members of the community in which the murders took place, and an obsessive stalker who has put me on notice that he is committed to discrediting me and my project (you know – the one he hasn’t even read). But there may be others who are keeping an eye on what I plan to reveal, as well.

I have this great research assistant. She’s incredible. Brilliant, in fact. We met about a year and a half ago. Going into the research phase of the book, I was at a great disadvantage. I’d worked for a bit on the original documentary about this story decades ago, but left early on for reason I’ll not share. That’s how I met the victims’ families and how I became quite close to some of them. But when I left that film project about eighteen months in, I was out. Gone. I didn’t keep tabs on it. Until I was asked to do this book, I’d never even seen the finished product (products, actually, because as it turns out there were two parts). Twenty years had passed. As such, I was faced with a massive learning curve in starting my book. That’s where my researcher came in, and may explain in the smallest way why she is so indispensable to the completion of the project.

One issue with telling this story is that it largely belongs to the internet, now. Law enforcement has no interest pursuing the cold case. None whatsoever. So, internet crime sleuths and armchair detectives have overtaken it. That has its own set of problems. But these folks revealed one of the sticking points for people who, like my researcher, feel that previously created projects about this crime (including the original documentaries) have missed the mark. And they’re right.

Most people believe and accept that there are two men responsible for the murders of these people. As such, all the focus in books, podcasts, and films highlight them to the exclusion of almost anyone else. To be fair, I fall into that group for the most part. However, there are other possibilities that demand exploration. So that’s where my researcher and I have spent most of our energy.

Who knew it would lead us down perilous and potentially lethal rabbit holes, right? Yet here we are.

My book, as those who follow this blog know, was finished in early February. It’s rough, in need of an unforgiving cleanse, and is nowhere near ready to be seen by others. Not even editors. But it’s done, technically.

Just a heads up for others writing a true crime book about unsolved murders: your book will never really be done. Ever. Not until the case is either solved or you decide you’ve taken it as far as it can go.

For months now, there has been a detail of this crime that my researcher and I have been trying to piece together. Something we believe hasn’t been thoroughly addressed. Something I’ve discussed at length with a member of law enforcement formerly involved in this case. Something that has nothing to do with the two most popular suspects.

Independently of one another, my researcher and I stumbled upon a docuseries unrelated to our case. Or so we thought. Turns out, in one of the episodes, some of the Persons of Interest named in the files we have, who we’d discounted as unimportant, were prominently featured. Four names, to be exact.

It was shocking, to say the least. Intrigued, we were determined to learn more. So, we started digging. We contacted people involved in that project and another adjacent project. Next thing you know, we’re in lengthy phone conversations with the biological son of a known CIA hitman, the director and journalist who drove the docuseries, and a man whose name — well, to quote one unnamed man speaking on a taped conversation in the docuseries, “…just knowing this man’s name gets people killed.”

We’ve been warned not to name him in emails. They’re flagged. And phone calls? Our understanding is that they’re still being monitored, so we have to be mindful of what we say.

Yeah. I’m not making this up. Told you it would sound crazy. It sure sounds crazy to us. The irony is, our interest in these folks is extremely narrow. Limited to exploring a particular witness’ account of our crime. We didn’t and don’t believe these folks we’re talking to tie into our crime, per se. They sort of might, though, or could. To be honest, we’re both hopeful they don’t. But we have to take the lead and follow it to the (bitter?) end.

This led us to another cold case murder, which we now may have information on to give the applicable law enforcement agency handling it. Moreover, we may have tied two massive, seemingly unrelated crime syndicates, together.

See? Things never end with an unsolved true crime project until you say it’s finished. We’re nearly there.

For now, we’re doing our best to lay low, emphasize that we are not interested in being heroes by sticking our noses where they don’t belong, etc. But I’ll be honest. It’s scary sometimes.

Many blog posts ago, I mentioned that I’d started feeling a bit uneasy and like I couldn’t secure my home enough to feel comfortable (locks, security system, personal protection, etc.). Looking back at where things were at that point in time vs. now, it’s laughable. If someone had told me three years ago when I first agreed to do this book that I’d be dealing with—as my researcher once quipped—“LSD-slinging ninjas,” I’d have laughed. Instead, two weeks ago, I found myself meeting with a fellow writer who also wrote a book about this case. Why did we meet? Well, one reason was to tell him that if anything happens to me, I want him to finish the book and get it out for the victims’ family.

How on earth did we get here? Moreover, how do we get out?

The good news is, I believe we’ve gleaned enough from these underworld-adjacent figures to confidently answer the original question that prompted us to contact them. And let’s be honest. They’ve all been gracious in agreeing to speak to us. Most have been very helpful. None of them have treated us like the paranoids we so often see ourselves as these days.

This month, we’ll each be traveling from our respective homes for a weekend visit with the victims’ family members. There, we’ll relay the details of these encounters. I’ll also be taking some photographs to include in the book, if I can re-learn how to use my long-neglected Nikon D5500. I’ll return the large box of personal files entrusted to me by the family. And hopefully, when I return, I’ll finally settle in to tackle this massive edit so I can push the book out.

Maybe I’ll even get a good night’s sleep, huh?

Here’s hoping everyone enjoys June, when spring ends and summer begins heating things up.

TTFN